I gathered my equipment because I know the time is near;
I come up with a different plan, each and every year;
At dusk I shut my windows and always lock my door;
But every Easter Morning the Evidence is on the floor.
He used to bring me candy and hide a bunch of eggs;
Now he leaves his droppings, I slipped and broke both my legs;
It started at the age of eight, in my bare feet;
I accidentally left him exlax for his nightly treat.
Each year I have a shotgun and try to stay alive;
Because he always comes to visit, even at age of forty five.
Each year waiting up late, I always fall asleep;
Thatís when he leaves his presents right at my feet;
I know you might be laughing, but this isnít very funny;
Advice to all the kids, do not p*ss off the Easter Bunny!
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